Monday, December 26, 2022


I woke up the other night from a dream that I felt was way too short and seemed to be just a little too real.

Let's start with a basic thing.  I'm from a small town. I have been to a number of big towns ( New York, Chicago, St Louis, Los Angeles) I had worked in an ER in new Jersey for 6 weeks.  I rarely get a chance to get out of the house en femme. I have done it where I have gone out in the country at night in my mini skirt and heels and watch the stars, but is has been a while. 

Going on.  I was walking down this city street. It seemed like New York, but is was so odd. It was mid afternoon.  It seemed like it was early fall, and starting to get a little chill to the air.  I was walking down a street and there were tall buildings all around.  I thought I just love the big city. You can get lost in the people here and no one to pay you any mind. the I notice that there were no people. I was walking down the street and I didn't see anyone.  I got to the end of the side walk and was walking across the street. I got to the curb and looked town to step up on the curb. As I looked down I noticed that I was wearing a very dark red sequined dress that was about 8 inches above my knee. I had on black hose that was patterned and I had black heels on. I had a black leather coat on that was open.  as i bent my head down to step up in the curb, my long dark brown hair fell onto my face. I used my right hand to brush my hair out of my face and hook it behind my right ear. when I touched my face and ear I woke up.

I was so pissed. I didn't want to wake up then. I wanted to keep walking.

Here are what some of the things in my dream looked like.

My Dress:, Except it was a darker red. More like a venous blood red.

My Stockings

My Heels were similar but black,

My Coat:

and my hair.  I really like this style.  Would love to grow it out like this. 

Funny ;; I read a book this past fall.  Altered states of consciousness. Was hoping there would be something in there on dream interpretation, but no luck.  

I have been watching  a lot of sissy hypno videos and have done  couple of audio only sessions.   It's probably related to that. 

thanks for stopping by,

Tuesday, December 13, 2022

 Hi All

I'm back. 

 In case some one noticed that I was gone.  

About a year ago. (but maybe 18 months ago),  I thought I as going to give this up.  I did have some health issues that have become apart of me for the rest of my life. I thought I should step up and stop being girly. I stopped this blog, stopped reading other peoples blog and, did a purge of my girl clothes.  This is about the 3rd or 4th purge that I've have.  Things went okay for a while, but I noticed that I was getting depressed. Going back, I think this was the longest time that I went by since I had a purge. must have been 5 + years since I Purged.  Now I'm just frustrated.  I had some nice dresses, shoes. lots of panties and bras.  Now I have to build up my wardrobe.  It sucks. the big one.  But I already have a few pairs of pantie's,  Not much but it is a start. I

I'll try to post a few things here once in a while. 

If you did notice that I was gone, thanks for noticing.


Monday, October 19, 2020

Do you know the taste of Semen? : A Story I want to tell

 It was a fall when I was in college.  It was a Saturday. None of my friends wanted to go out, so I went by myself to this bar that always had really nice bands to listen to.  I had had a few beers and was standing leaning against a pillar that held up the the balcony.  I noticed that there was a guy leaning against the other side of the pillar. We made eye contact and I said hi, and that it was a nice band. He agreed and we talked about some of the songs that they had played and how much they sounded like the original musicians.  I was going to go get another beer. and when asked if I wanted to go to his place and smoke some weed. I said that would be fun. We left. he got in his car and drove around till he found me and I followed him in my car to his apartment.  we got there and his room mate and his room mate's girl friend were there. We all talked for a bit then they looked like they wanted to go off to bed.  John( I don't remember his name) went and got some pot and rolled a joint.  We started smoking. i got really high. I was kind of spacing out when he said that he was under a lot of stress and that his shoulder were really tight from the stress and asked if I would give him a massage. Sure, why not. I started on his shoulder, which really did feel tight when I first started, but slowly loosened up. He said that really helped and asked if he could return the favor. Ok. soon he was rubbing my shoulder and my back, then before I knew it he was massaging my ass.  I had to admit the whole thing felt really nice.  Then he leaned in my ear and asked if I wanted to go to bed.  I said sure. Now I have to say that at that time I was a virgin. I hadn't yet gotten lucky with a woman and at that time had never even considered being with a guy.  He went and turned of the lights and we climbed the stairs. also at that time I had been crossdressing for many years, but didn't know much about it except that I enjoyed pretending to be the girl. As I was climbing the steps. I became the girl even though I didn't have a single piece of girls clothing on. We got to his room and he said I could put my clothes on the chair by the bed. I stripped and watched him get undressed. We crawled into bed and started to make out.  Soon he had my cock in his hand. He kissed my neck and then he worked his way down and then sucked me for a bit. No one had ever done that to me before. I asked him to stop, and he did. He then moved up and straddled my chest and stuck his cock in my mouth and then fucked my face. I had no idea of how to give a blow job. I think he got frustrated by that and asked if I liked to fuck. I think I was so stoned all I could do was smile.  He said great and got some lube and put on his cock. I was lying on my back and he lifted my legs up to where my knees were on my chest.  He said just relax and pushed himself in. I didn't think it hurt or anything.  I do know it felt good and as he kept pumping me I started to like it more. after a while he asked me if I would like to fuck and I said sure. I was too stoned to do anything. and asked him to sit on my cock. I was so anxious and excited I don't think I lasted more then 5 or six strokes when I came in his ass.  He got off of my crotch and then laid down beside me and started beating himself off. He asked me to come close and I rested my head on his chest.  I was so confused at that point. I wanted to take his cock in my hand and beat him off so that  could to that for him. I thought of trying to suck his cock, but he had just had that in my ass, so there was no way I'd do that.  He came pretty soon and I got some on my face. I Don't know how he saw it when it was as dark as it was, but he wiped some off with his finger and then wiped it on my lips. I was so stoned all I did was lick it off my lips. Then like so many time when I came when I was cross dressed I had a tremendous amount of guilt. I sat up and said I had to go, I had to work the next day. I got dressed and left. Got back to my apartment, and the next morning my roommates were giving me a bad time about getting lucky and would I ever see her again.  If they only knew.  

Ever since I have had that event go through my head so many times. How different things would be if I had taken his cock in my hand given him a hand job. If I had asked if he would do me doggy style.   If I would have talked to him again when I met him in the cafeteria.  Since then I have had fantasizes of me being his girl. I've even thought of me being the girl in a MFM with him and another guy.  But maybe that is just a common fantasy of crossdressers.   

If you have have read this far I have to say thank you for taking the time and dropping by.  Kisses, Rhonda


Monday, June 22, 2020


Hi. I had this dream the other night. It was really odd and I at one point thought that I really didn't want this to end. I wished that was how my life was.
     I had fallen asleep on the couch. In this time of self isolation I was just in my underwear and a T shirt.  I was sleeping and then I had this sensation of someone kissing my neck. They moved my hair out of the way and started kissing my ear and saying how sexy I looked. I was really getting turned on. He then moved his hand to my stomach and then slowly moved it upward, I could feel him unbuttoning my blouse. Then it was like. I'm not wearing  a button up blouse. Soon he had his hand on my breast and was caressing it and rubbing my nipples. I felt like I was being set on fire. But wait.  I'm a guy.  Why are you caressing my breasts. I  don't have breasts.  Do I ? I opened my eyes and looked down. Sure enough. I almost started crying.  Oh I have wished I had breasts for so long. They were as beautiful as I had always hoped. I was so aroused. . Then he stopped. I could feel him moving away.  I heard him sit on the chair that was next to the couch, I rolled over and sat up. I looked at what I was wearing, an off-white collarless button up blouse and some pink love bikini panties.

 I didn't recall having these pieces before. I could feel that I was wet. He was sitting in the chair next to the couch. He still had his pajama bottoms on, but no shirt. You could tell that he worked out a lot.  Dark hair. getting a little too long from how he usually had it. Not yet shaved for the day.
He looked at me and asked, "Do you want me to make the coffee?" .
"No. Not yet."
I got up and walked over to his chair and sat on his lap, straddling him.. Gave him a long wet kiss and leaned into his ear and said. " Don't you usually finish what you start?"
He then turned his head and started kissing my neck again. He had his hands on my waist and  moved them up and grabbed each of my breasts and gave each one an appreciative squeeze.  Then he started that thing with my nips again.

 I don't know how it happened but I suddenly realized I was gyrating pelvis on his. I could feel him getting hard underneath me. That seemed to arouse me even more. I sat up and shrugged off my blouse. He leaned forward and kissed each of my breasts, then went on to lick my nips. I don't know how to tell you how much that turns me on. I was arching my back trying to make my breasts more accessible to him. grinding my pelvis into him. Oh my God.. then I felt his hand slip into my panties. That moment of dread. He's going to find my little clitty(dick) and this will be over.  But soon he was rubbing something that was so pleasurable.  Ohhh. I let out a gasp.. I leaned forward, and tried to spread my legs some. Then he put a finger inside me. Ohhh. I gasped again. Oh my god.  My pelvis started moving and I had no control of it. I wanted to return the favor and give him pleasure too. I climbed off him and stood before  him,
 I peeld off my panties and kneeled before him. I reached up and untied the knot holding his PJ's on.  I started pulling them down, he lifted his butt up and up popped a beautiful cock. I pulled his pajama off and the moved between his knees. I took his cock in my hand then leaned up and gave it a little kiss. I took it in my mouth.

 I've had a cock in my mouth before but none that tasted this good.  I started to suck him and it felt like my life depended on it. I felt like I had a spot in my mouth that if I kept doing this I was going to cum.  I felt that I was on fire.

 He stopped me. lifted me up and had me straddle him again.  I stuck his finger in me again.  Oh... I moaned, I said I wanted him in me. I lifted myself up and he rubbed his cock against my opening.  It felt like he was holding a red hot rod against my skin. He slowly slid it in me.  I let out a loud moan.  I slowly slid down on him, feeling him fill me up.  I started moving up and down on his lap, feeling him going in and out of me. I could feel a sensation building up in me.  I started to move faster and he started to go faster as well.  Soon I felt something like an explosion inside of me,  I felt like I was going to have a convulsion. I started to have muscle contractions every where. I was quivering, shaking uncontrollably.  I collapse forward on him and just laid against his body. I could still feel him in me. He was slowly moving himself in and out.  I kissed his neck and kissed his lips and smiled at him. He said, "I'll make the coffee."  I smiled at him and gave him a kiss again, and move over to the couch. curled up with a blanket and fell asleep.
I don't know how long I slept.
I woke up in my T shirt and underwear. Saw my breasts were gone my pussy was gone.  Shit!

Monday, April 27, 2020

Hi. I know why you're here. You're expecting some sort of gratification, acknowledgement, of who you are, what you are or who you want ot be.

I wish I had the power to help you in your journey. All I can do is encourage you. Take that step. it only takes a step at a time and then you are closer to your goal.  Most of the steps aren't non-reversible. You can  take a step and decide if you like it. You can stay at that point till you are ready to go to the next step.

Start wearing panties all the time.
There's nothing wrong with wearing panties. They are so comfy. they give you that support to keep you tucked away, and looking like a girl. That's what you want isn't it? 

Next you have to wear a bra. that is the one thing you have wear. Nothing else marks you as a gurl want-to-be as wearing a bra. And there are so many to chose from too. And you can get a panties, bra matching set..  How sexy is that ?

So a bra and panties? Nice small step. Don't you feel good in your progress. Now you need a dress. What's the sense of looking so good in your bra and panties. Sure you can run around the house in just those, but don't you want to look more femme. So a dress would be nice.. What kind? what kind of gurl are you wanting to be?

 Personally, I've had my eyes on this one, but just waiting for that special occasion.

Oh and don't forget your hair. You will need to grow it out or get a wig. which then give you the options of being a blond of brunette or a redhead.  

Now you look fabulous.  Now you are so sexy,  You can move the world. or make parts of it hard. You know what I mean. Why look so sexy if you can't take advantage of it. You know what I mean. Now you can do those things that girls get to do and it's acceptable.  Flirting, go out on dates. Showing your date that you had a good time by giving him a good time. That is why you started dressing? 
Isn't it?
You see you've made small steps. and each step is still reversible. You can go back.  
So what would be the next step.?
Yes you know.
Yes it is kissing the big stick.
Sure it's a big step. You have to go through a lot in your head. to do that. That question of "but I'm not gay, am I?"  No you're not. You are a gurl.  Girls do that. They do it all the time. Look at yourself in the mirror. Don't you see that person in a dress, You can see the out line of the bra underneath, the long hair, the lipstick, the gorgeous legs.
No you're not gay, you're a girl. go ahead. It's just a step that you can still reverse things. you can still go back to how you were. It may be harder for you, as you will start to see some of the power that you have.  How you have so much control of a guy when you are on your knees between his legs.

You can look up into his eyes and see the power you have over him. 

So you see, all the steps so far are reversible.  
You can still go back to being the guy that used to wear dresses. and gave great blow jobs
But then there is another step.

And you know that step too.
That's right. You want to make love with a man. All those worries and problems of premature ejaculation will disappear. You don't have to worry about pleasing the girl. You are the girl and what ever he does to you will please you. It will feel so good. To make love and not have to worry of cumming too early. Sure it may hurt a little when you first start, but you know that if you use plenty of lube, things go better. And you can always practice with toys before advancing to the real thing.

And you can get your manhood fucked out of you, and you could still walk away and go back to being the guy that used to wear dresses and liked to give blow jobs and take it in the ass.
All the steps so far have been reversible. 
So what do you have to do to cross that line to not being able to turn back.
Well we all wish we had them,

Having breasts is the true commitment to being a sissy. You have boobs, and there is no way to going back to being that  guy that wears dresses and likes to give blow jobs and get fucked in the ass.
Now you are the gurl that likes all those things. and girls like those things.

You can wear real sexy tops.

If you had them then you could enjoy some nipple play
I've had a few orgasms' by  just having my nips sucked.

So do what you need to do and want to do to make yourself  happy with yourself.  You all know what lines you have to cross get to that point where you will be happy with yourself and be closer to how you want to be. What lines you want to cross and which ones you wish you could cross are all up to you.  Do what you can to make yourself happy with how you are. 

Thanks for stopping by to read my post.

So many Questions

Obviously I reblogged this from Rauk22.. wish she was still around.
With having to do social distancing and then working from work. Ron had so many things that he had to consider now. Did he have a virtual staff meeting today or not?  What all was he going to get done as far as work and things around the house. But this morning was proving more difficult than usual. What shade of lipstick should he wear.